Some people only wants to be with you when you are glorious, whereas some people is willing to stick with you through ups and downs. The main character, Scott Hastings, has his original ballroom dancing partner known as Liz. When Scott started dancing his "own steps", Liz felt embarrassed and wished for another dancing partner.
Side note: It is rather hilarious that Liz's wish just came true when Liz said "What do I want? I'll tell you what I want! I want Ken Railings to walk in here right now, and say 'Pam Shortt's broken both her legs, and I wanna dance with you!" After saying this, what she wished really happened. And it is unrealistic in real world settings. This is workable to be inserted in a comedy movie, however it might make no sense to the audience and leave the audience feeling weird.
Fran, on the other hand, stayed by Scott even though she has been many times abandoned by him. She accepted Scott for who he is, embraced his uniqueness, and encouraged him to do what he is passionate in. From a psychology perspective, this is known as Unconditional Positive Regard, a Carl Roger's concept from his humanistic psychology approach. Unconditional Positive Regard is when one truly takes in and likes another for what he or she is; one will not abandon another even when the person has done something wrong and unacceptable (McLeod, 2014).
Liz can be explained to have Conditional Positive Regard, where she only loves Scott when he does things right and when he is widely praised by public. If Scott were to capture Liz's attention and love, it would be rather torturing to Scott as he has to behave in a certain way that pleases Liz. Unfortunately, this could be seen in households nowadays where children is panicking to please their parents. This will cause the children to be constantly pleasing and seeking for approval from their parents (McLeod, 2014). In the long run, this unhealthy mindset and behavior can even be problematic and severe as the children learn to do things only in favor of others. This could led to behavioral problems in future relationships and workplace. Additionally, children as such could also have issues such as low self-esteem, low confident, and lacking of interest in oneself. There is possibility that this child-raring practice could led to psychopathic behaviors.
Moreover, Carl Roger mentioned that the development of congruence is dependent on unconditional positive regard (McLeod, 2014).
People who has congruence development has higher possibility of being self-actualized. Our feelings, experiences, and behaviours are in-line with how we see ourselves (self-image). Ideal-self, on the other hand is how we want ourselves to be.
Both self-image and ideal-self should be closely related to one another in order for us to feel worthy. If this condition is not met, a person is known to be in a state of incongruence. This could led to problems such as denied or distorted perception towards self. When this happens, one might use defense mechanism to feel better and thus suppress unfavorable feelings. This could negatively impact one's mental well-being. Therefore, being educated Unconditional Positive Regards by Carl Rogers, we should avoid treating people with conditions to prevent things as such to occur to others. Also, when others treat us with conditional positive regard, know that this person is not someone worth pleasing and try to properly withdraw from this relationship for the sake of our own mental health.
References
McLeod, S. A. (2014). Carl Rogers. Retrieved from www.simplypsychology.org/carl-rogers.html
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